posted by 4th Dwarf
- Wear attractive underwear in case you didn’t hear in advance that it is No pants day.
- Carry dance accessories for an unexpected rave.
- Get in running shape so you can beat the train between a pair of stops.
- Get comfortable with insects so you do not panic and pull the emergency brake when a performance artist releases a swarm of crickets to highlight the plight of the homeless.
- Carry a notebook to jot down books you want to read. You’ll want to keep up with the books other passengers are perusing.
- Take care of your libido at home. The new stations may seem like ideal spots for getting it on, but it is not a good idea to engage in full-on sex on the platform.
- Carry spare change so you can help out the needy.
- Turn off the voice recognition on your smartphone in case someone yells “Hey Siri, text mom, I’m pregnant.”
- Most important - Learn how to use your phone so you can shoot a viral video.